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It's not pretty.

I've been struggling the past several days. There is no need to lie about it. It's been rough.
I had good intentions, like I always do. I started out with a plan, albeit a half ass plan. It was something. Then, it all went to hell. There was a lunch that escalated into a couple lunches that snowballed into a few dinners that became 2 slices of wedding cake that became "Omg, why isn't my zipper staying up?".
And that's where I am right now. Feeling really fat, bloated and gross.
I was dreading the scale today and even thought about avoiding it. That was just a silly thought though. The whole reason I'm in this mess is because I haven't been accountable and haven't been honest about my progress. I've fallen into that rut where it becomes okay to think that you can binge today because you can always start over tomorrow. Of course, tomorrow becomes the next day and the next day and the next day and there you are.
So, here we are.

199.8
That's a gain of 5.2.
Makes me want to cry.
I know this journey is going to be full of ups and downs and highs and lows and yes, even gains along with the losses. So, why do I feel like such a loser?
I certainly don't have the answers. I could cut myself some slack and I kindof have. But, I know that's not the mindset I need. It's okay to forgive myself for the little slips, but not this. If I forgive myself for this, in my mind that will make it okay and it will continue.
I need to turn it around and get back on track. Tomorrow is another day. Tomorrow is when I start. Again.
I need to set a short term goal to help keep me motivated. I'll get back to you on that. Tomorrow.
I can do this. I know we all can.
Who's with me?

1 comment:

  1. I don't think I've ever been here before! Howdid I not know about this?!

    So - I've just signed up to the twittermania, I fele so out of the loop..... I don't know how to use it.... this is what 90 year olds must feel like about computers and the internet...

    HEY - stop being so negative.... ah who am I kidding, I know exactly how you feel; but seriously - you know that you just need to hop back on and keep on trucking... there's no other way to do it.

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